Monday, 22 April 2013

Oh yes, I want a invisible, yet visible one. {I want to BE an embodied story}

I have wondered at tattoos for just a while now.  Most people who have one totally scare me..{why do people seem so much more courageous than me because they have permanently marked their skin?}

I want to permanently mark myself, and if I were ever to come to a peace with tattoos I would get one to symbolise it all, but really I want to be permanently marked deeper than my surface-skin.  I want to be marked right through, I want to be so full I burst.

I want to be so permeated by the love of God that I cannot help but reveal it to those around me.

I am completely permeated with the love of God, He loves me deeper than deep, wider than wide, and beyond all, but does it show?

Does it go deeper than deep, yet still show at the surface?

I don't want it to be a huge pebble that is dropped, ripples, sinks and settles, I want it to wash over and over, I want it to shake me, I want it to breathe life into these dry bones, every. single. day.

I am not marked in ink but I am marked in love, and after all, that is what counts really.

I want to fall onto my knees every day, I want to hold my hands out and receive His daily bread, every morning.

I want to love like He first loved us.  I want to be visibly changed so people ask me what it is I have.

I want people to ask me why my tattoo seems different, invisible to sight, but still visible.

I want to receive more and more and more of God, I want to hand my dignity to Him, so He can look after it.  Let His will be done.  Let His life-giving words be breathed over me, and through me and in me.

I want God to carve His plan into my heart, I want Him to shape, mould and build me.  I want to go further into Him, and into what He has for me.

And I want the tattoo to grow, so it isn't just on my arm, but be in my mouth, in my feet, my hands, my words, my judgements, my understandings, my every single thing.

I want it to be bigger than just ink, but I want it to be just as permanent.

I want for the holiness of a pen, to be flowing through me, so that it is not just by words that I write, but also by my life.  I want my life to write His story into the lives of every person I meet.

I am scared, there is going to be pain, but it will be worth it.

I can't do this.  ...but I am not doing this {THANK GOD}, God is doing it, through me., by Him, I am trusting in His strength IN me, to do all this.

This post is part of a syncroblog over at A Deeper Story, there is something about these women I've been following, their tattoos have made me have a tinge of jealousy because they have it there reminding them every single day.  I don't have a tattoo, and I'm not convinced that I ever will, but ^this^ is the sort of tattoo I want.